I didn't see Derek during the day, as he had business to attend to and I was busy listening to Augusta plan for her party. I enjoyed it though, partly because it kept my mind distracted from any other thoughts but mostly because Augusta was acting quite like her self from before the war. Little could have made me happier than to see that haunted glimmer disappear from her eyes.
The night of the ball was bright with a full moon and a multitude of stars glimmering above. The ballroom doors and windows were opened to let in a fresh breeze and garlands of flowers were hung around every possible piece of furniture to bring in the smells of summer. It seemed to me like a little bit of heaven.
Maria dressed me in a lovely gown of sapphire blue with flowers of pearls littering the skirt and draped around my neck. She said I looked like a fairy princess and I almost believed her because of the look on Derek's face as I entered the ballroom.
He approached me from across the room and then gave me a sweeping bow that forced me to push down a chuckle. He came up from the bow with a teasing twinkle in his eye as he held out an arm for me to take hold of.
"You are breathtaking," he whispered in my ear as he led me across the floor to where Augusta stood with father. I glanced over and saw that he still had that twinkle in his eyes. I don't know what I would have done if he had been serious but because I knew he was teasing I could take the compliment without a blush.
"Thank you, my good prince," I replied airily. "I am honored to take your breath away." He chuckled and I felt it in the arm I held.
"You always have," he whispered again. I looked a question at him but he just winked and then we were before the Queen.
Augusta oohed and aahed over me until I felt myself squirming under the gazes of all those around me and wishing I was anywhere but dolled up at a ball.
"Dance with me." Derek was already pulling at my hand, leading me away from a surprised Augusta and a quietly laughing Father. I could do nothing but follow.
The music was already playing and he pulled me close and then started laughing in my ear.
"Why are you laughing?" I asked, pulling away to see his face. He was trying to fight a smile as he laughed but was failing miserably.
"Oh, Squirt, you really are something," he replied. The dance pulled us apart for a minute and I waited anxiously to interrogate him further.
"Something? What is that supposed to mean?" He wasn't laughing anymore but his twinkling eyes roamed over my face in amusement.
"Something special," he clarified. "Here you stand, the most beautiful woman to ever grace this dance floor, and yet you blush at the slightest compliment and look as though you'd rather be feeding the frogs than dancing around this room right now, where everyone can admire you and wonder how that darned foolish prince ever convinced you to dance with him."
I stared at him in shock and it was only with a firm pull on my arm that he got me to continue the dance and not get in the way of the others dancers on the floor.
"I would rather be feeding the frogs," I finally managed to say after an entire minute of trying to sift through the compliments he had given me and the meaning behind them. He raised an eyebrow at me and then bent closer with an intensity on his face that made him look just a little dangerous.
"Why?" he asked. "What makes you different from all the other girls?" It wasn't an accusation, just a sincere statement of a fact and wondering curiosity to know why that was so.
I paused before answering, thinking back to the many times I had tried to be just like those other girls. For so long that was all I really wanted. I wanted the beauty and the compliments and the fame that came with it. I wanted to be fawned over and talked about like every other beautiful princess out there. So what changed? Why was it that now that I had those things - the beauty and the fame and the handsome princes - why was it that I turned away from the compliments and the fawning and the fame and instead wanted to be out feeding my frogs?
I smiled softly and tried to answer as best as I could. The danced slowed for the end of the song and Derek stepped close to me as we circled one another. My voice was loud enough for him to hear but soft enough that no one else could.
"Because I know what true beauty is." Derek's eyebrows lifted slightly and he leaned closer. "And I know that, despite what may be popular opinion, the things that these people compliment me for and seek for are only fleeting. They will disappear with the seasons and the years and no one will remember that Princess Meglyn was said to be uncommonly pretty or that her hair curled in such a way." I blushed but continued, finding the words coming easily now that I had started. "if I do not find my value in the things they say then I will not be disappointed when they have stopped saying them. I have found that to base my worth on beauty and fame is to build my confidence on a very sandy foundation. I prefer to build on rocks."
The dance ended just then but Derek and I forgot to end with the usual bow or to walk away. We stood on the dance floor, facing one another and locked in each other's eyes. I couldn't break away from the look he was giving me. It was as though he was seeing me for the very first time, and yet in that seeing he understood exactly what he saw. It was the most frightening and yet freeing experience and I felt rooted into the ground.
Finally the hustle of the crowd around us brought us back to the present moment and Derek offered his arm to me to escort me off the dance floor. As we neared the outer door, where I assumed Derek was taking me so we might talk some more in private, we were accosted by an extremely good looking young prince named Ander. He was tall with light hair and a perfectly smooth face and smile to match. I had already been informed of his arrival the night before and of how every single lady at the ball was looking forward to meeting him. It quite surprised me then that he should so directly seek me out, as he told both Derek and I, and that he should seek my hand for two dances before having even been properly introduced to me.
"I hope the princess will not think me too forward," Prince Ander apologized with his perfect smile and rather adorable foreign accent, "but I have heard so much of you and I wanted to make certain of enjoying your companionship on this one night I have in Chambry." He looked as dashing as could be and I couldn't find the heart to refuse so I mumbled out an acceptance as he extended an arm towards me.
We began to pass a rather stunned Derek when Ander paused and leaned over to whisper something to him. I'm sure I wasn't meant to hear but with the noise of the crowd and the level Ander was forced to speak at I really couldn't stop myself from listening.
"You will forgive me, Highness, I am sure," Ander began, the smilie still on his face, "for stealing away your lovely partner, but I was assured that you are quite like an older brother to the princess, if you take my meaning." He took a step away from Derek, who's face was suddenly a study in marble but who's eyes were balls of flame that flashed towards the both of us. "I am sure you will not mind."
And then Ander pulled at me and I had to turn away from Derek so I lost sight of the strangely and unexpcted vicious look that had entered his eyes.
Ander and I danced through the next two dances and though I found him to be good company and an enjoyable conversant, I could not take my mind off of Derek or the effect Ander's words had had on him.
It was true that Derek and I were quite like brother and sister. Everyone knew that to be so. Especially after all of the rumors had been quenched regarding our secret engagement before the war. It was common knowledge that Derek was an older brother to me and I his little sister.
So why should it so anger him when Ander said what he did? What was there to be mad about?
I didn't have time to think about it before I was asked for another dance by Lord Grishm and then another after that by a different lord. The pattern continued throughout the night and I only caught glimpses of Derek around the edges of the room while I danced.
I was surprised to notice after a while that he did very little dancing of his own. He danced with his mother, as usual, and with an older duchess who had always had a soft spot for him. But though there were many eligible young ladies throughout the room, and many pretty ones at that, he never asked them to dance. The strangeness of it hit me as the last dance ended and I wondered with all of my tired brain what could have effected him so much as to change a lifelong habit in one night? Derek was always dancing with the pretty girls. That was just a part of him.
I waited to get a chance to speak with him as the guests began to leave but I was told he had already gone to bed and so I shuffled off to my own room with an uneasy mind and a troubled heart.
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